Thankful

I just realized that I have accomplished one of my many goals. For the last month, every day before school the kids and I have put aside time to talk about God, read a verse, and pray. It may not seem like much, but It Is! There have been days when Ashleigh is reading in the van on the way to daycare or school. But we have made it without skipping a day. I just pray that God is working in each child's heart. I have been so blessed with every one of these children. Every day they amaze me, every day I am reminded that they are growing older and my days with them will not be forever. So thankful for each moment.

Little Accomplishments

Yesterday I started having family devotions with the kids in the morning before school. It is something that I have wanted to start for quite a while, but I was overwhelmed at how to go about it. Mornings can be rough, getting the kids out the door, and to school is quite a feat in itself. Evenings are even harder. After work, homework, dinner and showers the whole night seems to race by, and by the end I am completely exhausted.

So, I decided to try and have all our morning activities done by 8 am. That gives us a half an hour to fit in devotions. I am so so pleased with how it is working out too. The kids are so open, and have so many questions. I can see God working so much in their hearts and minds. They are even memorizing verses, and are so excited to recite them back to me. I am just praying that God gives me the grace, strength and ability to keep it up. With out His help I know I will fail, but I know that He will be there for me.

Goals

For the last month or so I have been attempting to convert everything from two different homes into one house. Overwhelming doesn't even quite cover what kind of job it is. I feel as though I am drowning in a mountain of stuff...stuff, stuff and more...stuff. I have thrown away so many things and have donated even more, but I feel as though I am making little progress.. By the end of the summer I'd like to be able to have a more organized home. A garage that has no more boxes and totes full of junk and a basement that is clutter free... I am wondering if that is to much to expect with such a large household of people.. but that is one of my goals.

My other goal is to lose all this weight I've gained this winter and to get back to my fit old self. I love that I have the kind of husband who loves to spoil me with chocolate and milkshakes and who can cook such wonderful yummy things but I can't stand what is happening to my body..

Another even more important goal is to be able to sit down at least once a day with the kids and have some sort of devotions and prayer time with them. What a responsibility Jeff and I have and I want to do a much better job in this area.

I'd also like to be able to start my day without stressing.. Just getting out the door is enough to make my whole day stressed. I hate starting the day like that. I want to be able to relax, be happy, not nag, just get what I need to get done, done without feeling as though I am going to have a possible nervous breakdown. Do all mother's feel this way or does the 10th child push you over the edge?...or maybe it was the dog..

These are my goals for the next few months...lets see if they actually work out...

Snow Days

This pic was taken at the beginning of winter, back when 6" of snow seemed alot

We've had our share of snow this winter...I can say...officially..I've had quite enough. The kids absolutely love it though.. They have a great time sledding, building forts and any other thing that they can find to do in all that white stuff.. I'm kind of hoping that we've hit our quota for the year, but then it's only the middle of February... *sigh*

Changes

The last two years of my life have been like one crazy whirl-wind. It was the best of times and it was the worst of times. To say that my life has changed would be an understatement, but if there is one thing that I know, it is that God is in control and He DOES know the plans He has for us.

Dave and I separated over two years ago, and I went from being a stay at home mother of three, to a working single mom of four in little over a few months. Going through a divorce changes how you look at yourself. I had to redefine everything I knew about who I was. I questioned everything...everything. I made mistakes, I learned lessons, and I grew as a person.I'd like to say that my relationship with God grew during this time, but if anything, I felt more lost than I have ever felt before in my life. One thing that did not change, was that God didn't lose sight of me, even when I lost sight of Him. Two years into the darkest time of my life I finally gave up trying to control what was happening and just begged God to help me. I realized that all I was doing was creating an even bigger mess than the one that was already there. Divorce is horrible thing..it can destroy you if you let it, and you are never the same after it is over.

God heard my cries though, He knew my heart, and brought a man into my life that accepted me for me,loved me despite my flaws, and who loved my children as if they were his own. Jeff is the most amazing person I have ever met. He was a single Dad of 6 beautiful children, and if anyone out there understood what it was like as a single parent, it was him. He makes me want to be a better parent. He has the patience of a saint, and he is probably on of the most caring people I have ever met. It would be hard NOT to love Jeff, and to say he swept me off my feet would be an understatement. So here I am....10 children later...amazingly happy and incredibly blessed..